The rumours that no one’s job is safe these days has now become a reality and particularly so in certain sectors of the economy.  It should not be underestimated the impact on an individual to know that their job is at risk, even if it is not going to be for many months or even a year hence.  Such is the notice that is often given to employees in the public sector.

Just being put at risk of redundancy can be enough to send someone over the edge, which is why the way this news is communicated is so very important.   Too often I hear about people being given the news not by their manager but in a public forum or at a departmental meeting  when they noticed their post had been deleted from the structure,…. oops never mind.  No one had bothered to mention it to them before – oh dear.

Anyone finding themselves in this position is likely to experience the normal range of human emotional reactions of shock, embarrassment, anger, betrayal, disappointment and dented self-esteem.   As a consequence, their loyalty, their productivity and regard for their organisation is likely to take a hit also.  It will dip for a while (if not indefinitely), until they can rationalise what has happened and put it behind them.  Alternatively, the damage will have been done and the employee can no longer hold their organisation and colleagues in high regard.  Negativity, often covert, accompanied by stress is likely to set in, all of which could have been avoided with more effective and thoughtful communication.  

 It could be said, well, that’s life and it’s their problem – point taken.  However, it is never too late to show compassion and mitigate as much as possible the effects on those who are at risk of losing their job.  Much pain and confusion could be avoided with a little more care in communication – it’s the difference between an employee who may be angry at what is happening but understands the rationale versus one who is switched off and still being paid for the next six months.  Whilst it may be common place to become unemployed, don’t let our attitude towards small acts of kindness become a rarity.   

Last week I talked about enriching and nurturing your ‘Self’ and the choice you have of doing something or nothing.  Whichever one you choose, at least you have made a decision one way or the other or have you? Doing nothing is a ‘choice’ if you accept that there will be consequences.   If you ‘do nothing’ and continue to moan about the consequences or act as though it’s nothing to do with you, then you haven’t really made a choice.   Real choices are made when you ACCEPT the consequences that are the result of the choices YOU make.  When you do this, you will find that the landscape around you starts to look very different as you start taking control and responsibility for yourself and your life.

At work, it’s common for people to feel that there is nothing they can do to improve their situation.  It’s easy to fall into the trap of telling yourself and others that “I have to” or “I can’t “ or “I have no choice” creating a sense that it is out of your control and being imposed upon you from someone higher up in the organisation.  Most of the time, this is not the case.  When you feel that you have no control, it serves only to deplete your energy reserves and most likley impact on other areas of your life.

Here are an example that may sound familiar:

What you tell yourself:   I have to work late because its expected of me or I have so much to do

Consequences:  I never go to the gym, see my family or friends, have time for me, I always feel tired  

Feelings:  Fed up, angry, lack of control, it’s someone else’s fault, guilt, life is passing you by, stress

Impact on life:  Continue to work late, feel tired, dislike aspects of work, carry all of those energy draining feelings around with you daily

If you change your script (ie what you tell yourself) to sound something like this:

I choose to work late because ……. and I accept the consequences or

I want to spend more time with my family and and I’m going to do something to change my circumstances.

Then you are making a decision and taking responsibility for your situation.  This gives you back control of this aspect of your worklife and creates feelings that are empowering rather than draining.

You see, when you carry the 'I have to' script around with you, you tend to carry on doing it like a habit without question and this can carry on for years almost unconsciously.  When you make a real choice, suddenly the consequences of YOUR decisions to either yourself or those around take on a whole new meaning. 

Here is an exercise for you to do over the next few days.

Listen out for how often you use “I have to”, “I can’t”, “I have no choice” in your day to day language and look for ways of substituting it with:

- I choose to

- I choose not to

- I want to

- I am able to

- I can

Finally, you are constantly writing the chapters of your own life, every day – if you don’t like any aspect of it, change it – it’s your choice!

How much time do you spend time nurturing your 'Self'? By that I don't mean time spent socialising or sitting in front of the tv or going on a bender for the weekend. What I mean is the process of understanding your own sense of self and how you help and also hinder yourself as you go about your daily activities, primarily at work. Are you aware of what is great about you and what habitually holds you back. For most of us, we carry baggage of different weights, shapes and sizes; as we travel through life, some of us manage to offload the baggage at different points in time, for others, the load doesn't get any lighter, in fact, it grows heavier. For most of us, one way of lightening the load involves time spent with a good coach   or going through a coaching programme. This can be one of the most enriching experiences of ones life and one that serves to lighten our load.    

Work seems to be the place that most often tests our resolve, our resilience, sense of self   and self worth. It has the power to shape and define our lives of who we are and what we stand for like no other. If you love your work, how great that is. If you don't, that can present challenges to your daily existence, mostly in the form of mental and emotional turmoil as you seek to make sense of the reality around you. What do these challenges at work look like, I hear you say? Well, here are few for starters:

The strength of your sense of 'Self', your level of resilience, your attitude and the weight of your load, generally speaking, determine how you deal with the above situations. As a result of the aforementioned, the emotions that habitually arise time and again, none of which are healthy or productive, could include:

• feeling angry
• reduced confidence and   self-esteem
• going off ill
• stress
• feeling inferior to others
• blaming others for your lot in life
• becoming demotivated in your job and underperforming
• taking things personally and becoming very critical of self and others
• avoidance
• making assumptions and creating a mountain out of a molehill!

Or, you could learn to rise above it all simply by investing time in your 'Self', time that could yield lasting results.

Finally, ask yourself (and answer) these questions,

"How strong is your sense of Self"?

"How much do you value yourself"?

How much are you willing to invest in your 'Self'

How would your life be different if you dealt with same old, same old stuff, once and for all?    

Now ask yourself again, how much do I value my sense of 'Self'?

The Choice is yours and that will be my topic for next week.